On a whim I visited a church on Saturday evening. As luck would have it, there was a bbq afterwards. I found a group of people who seemed as non-threatening as possible and settled there for the evening. As I threw my trash away and came back to my group I looked around realizing I was in a group of all men. Somehow, I found myself encircled by all but 1 single men at church on a Saturday evening. I don't know if this happens to you on the regular but for me, it does not. Not Ever. EVER. So, having better judgement than I normally do I gracefully bowed out knowing that if I stayed any longer, having realized my situation, I would begin rambling eventually making a fool of myself. I walked away confidently giddy that I had just found myself surrounded by men! ;)
Throughout the entire weekend I found myself being complimented, on my creativity, my weight loss, my style sense. Do you ever just need these times? Times of people taking notice. Not that I would consider myself vain, but I need assurances from others time to time in various areas, encouragements, compliments. It's not as though throughout my days I hear a constant barrage of negative comments from others in these areas. In fact, on the regular I hear nothing at all. But maybe that's because I'm fixated on the barrage of negative comments coming from my own self. I cannot tell you how many times in a day I belittle my own self, my own ideas, my own opinions. It's a battlefield over here with me, myself, and I. Most times I'm totally unaware of it until I find myself in a funk for no apparent reason. When taking time to process I can understand the funk because I've been listening to my unkind self talk for days and have begun to believe it. For a moment in that group of men that voice was blocked out and I was free to be me, without reserve for fear that I may not seem "marriage material", without looking at each of them through my own "marriage material" lens. Just me. Just them.
So this evening I'm quiet and reflective. Thinking about life, the shortness of it, all the tragedy that comes through it, yet all the joy that is meant to be lived in it. There are moments in our lives that are sobering, tonight I think of September 11, 2001 of course, my own near death car accident in 2006, and I think of friends whose lives have recently been radically rocked forever with the news of cancer in their young bodies. Sobering. Life. Life is messy and incalculable. It is full of the unexpected when we continue to plan for what we presume to be the expected. So tonight I'm thinking there's just not enough time. Not enough time to fill my mind with all the can'ts, won'ts, nevers. There's not enough time in this 4 letter word called life to listen to my own rage and bitterness, mockery and self-defeat. There is still life to live. Life to be had. Life to dream up and pursue without the nagging voice of negativity.
So this September 11th, I remember and am reminded that life is still mine to live.
*I remember being in my dorm room asleep 10 years ago today. A freshman in college with no early morning classes that day. A girl on the hall came in to wake me to tell me the 1st tower had just been struck in New York. I was so confused, feeling as though I had just woken up in someone elses' life. I live in America. Things like this don't happen here. She left and still completely confused I laid back down trying to process what I had just been told. There was so much commotion in the hall I realized this had to be for real. I opened my door to find girls racing up the stairs to get to the t.v. and on their cell phones. I meandered up as well still fuzzy about the whole thing. As I sat down in the silently hysterical room we watched as the rest of the events occurred. The second plane hitting the 2nd tower. The Pentagon. We watched on, helpless and horrified, fearful and perplexed. A stream of emotions felt so deeply that day, that even today as I write, even now, I remember and shudder. I remember walking ground zero the following year, ash and memorials crowding the sidewalks. A sight I wouldn't have ever in my wildest imagination created as stood in the very same spot the summer of 2001. I remember. In a moment, everything about the world as I knew it was different and I remember.
Sunday, September 11, 2011
Tuesday, September 6, 2011
Foxes n Heels
I hope that where ever you are, today was as gorgeous for you as it was for me. It could not have been any better. Clear blue skies, a chill in the air with the hint of fall sprinkled in. Too good. So what better thing to do then enjoy it. I imagined my way through the work day, dreaming of the things I would do when I left. I'd go to the park and take a walk since I'd been using the heat as my excuse to not exercise out of doors. I'd go to the library and get some brilliant book that I could get lost in. And then, a little too late but just fine because it's almost autumn and the rules can be bent a bit, I'd get some deliciously healthy dinner and cozy up with my book. Doesn't that sound so wonderfully perfect? It does, but my plan was already sabotaged over the weekend.
This weekend I went to the country house, without a camera of course! My dear friend Kate's family has this house in my favorite memory of the country. Once, when I was apart of a traveling drama team in college we stayed at this gorgeous home on a farm that had all of these animals. It was because of this experience that I could ever imagine myself as some real country girl. I'm not, but I could imagine it. We'll the country house was just on the other side of the river from my memory. There were horses and cows, deer, and fish, rafts and the river. It was glorious! Perfect weather, perfect friends, and the perfect little setting. However, my not actually being a country girl or maybe just a coordinated girl did not fair well for me on the river. To save the story for another time I'll just tell you that I left the country house completely exhausted and sore as all get out only to get to return to work the very next day, today.
I, sadly, was a zombie today. I'm not sure that I could actually tell you much of what happened or who was there. I was sleepy. Really sleepy. So instead of cruising on to my awesome plans I decided a nap would be better. Then I could do all the awesomeness lined up for me. I set my alarm for 5 and was up at 6:50. I'm not sure how I do it but I'm quite skilled at ignoring or dismissing the alarm. I still wanted my dream evening to work out so I scrambled to the park. The sun was beginning to set so I knew I wouldn't be taking any long paths into the woods. So I more sauntered on my little path, looking at the trees, shoving my head phones into my pocket choosing the natural playlist already engulfing me. I passed readers, athletes, Mormon mommies, and old folks. A baby fox and I played what he probably thought was peek-a-boo. Whereas I was playing I'm-keeping-an-eye-on-you. I kept envisioning turning my head for one minute and him coming to swipe me out at the ankles. Whatever. I'm glad I have an imagination.
I took the long way to the library. Choosing the back curvy roads, lined with mansions whose costs are unspeakable. I stared, as much as I could while still remaining safe on the road, at the house of my dreams. A white 2 story, with southern charm. A sweet wrap around porch, with a second floor balcony complete with 2 white rocking chairs, ceiling fan, and a view of the expansive park. A cute little family played basketball in front of the garage while I pined away alone in my little car. *sigh* Someday. Well, maybe not someday for that exact picture but someday for the warmth that scene brought to my heart. Someday. Walking into the library, to what should my searching eyes rest on but Ree Drummond's book Black Heels to Tractor Wheels. Who's Ree Drummond you ask. Maybe you know her better as The Pioneer Woman. If you've not yet heard of her, continue to claw your way out from underneath that rock and fall in love with her sassy personality and heart stopping kitchen creativity over at her blog. You'll not regret it!
Then on the heels of 9o'clock I swung by Qdoba because it sounded tasty and I have a rewards card with them. If I'm going to eat out I might as well be rewarded for it right? I chose the vegetarian option, light on the dairy. He told me as he wrapped my bulging burrito that there was a slight tear. He asked if I wanted him to re-wrap it. When they ask you if you want it re-wrapped say yes. Always say yes. For if you don't and you chose, out of hunger and fear of eating after 9, to eat the massive burrito while driving you will have the death of that burrito all over the front of your shirt and the seat of your car. Pulling into my driveway I emptied the rest of that burrito into the bag it came in sufficing to just eat the tortilla. Trying to find some way to walk into my house without exposing the murder scene on my shirt the bag tore and the burrito remnants fell on to the door step. As I was trying to pick them up and fling them elsewhere I dropped my keys and the book into the mess and the door opened. The Man I Live With (there's not a shortcut around explaining them so I will just say I live with a family and they will be referred to as The Family I Live With, I'm not actually just living with a dude.) stood there peering down at my disaster. His words of comfort were that the dogs would get it. I scrambled inside and soaked my bean drenched shirt.
So, though, it didn't turn out quite like I expected I did have my glorious evening and feel like tomorrow I just be coherent enough to have another splendid evening!
This weekend I went to the country house, without a camera of course! My dear friend Kate's family has this house in my favorite memory of the country. Once, when I was apart of a traveling drama team in college we stayed at this gorgeous home on a farm that had all of these animals. It was because of this experience that I could ever imagine myself as some real country girl. I'm not, but I could imagine it. We'll the country house was just on the other side of the river from my memory. There were horses and cows, deer, and fish, rafts and the river. It was glorious! Perfect weather, perfect friends, and the perfect little setting. However, my not actually being a country girl or maybe just a coordinated girl did not fair well for me on the river. To save the story for another time I'll just tell you that I left the country house completely exhausted and sore as all get out only to get to return to work the very next day, today.
I, sadly, was a zombie today. I'm not sure that I could actually tell you much of what happened or who was there. I was sleepy. Really sleepy. So instead of cruising on to my awesome plans I decided a nap would be better. Then I could do all the awesomeness lined up for me. I set my alarm for 5 and was up at 6:50. I'm not sure how I do it but I'm quite skilled at ignoring or dismissing the alarm. I still wanted my dream evening to work out so I scrambled to the park. The sun was beginning to set so I knew I wouldn't be taking any long paths into the woods. So I more sauntered on my little path, looking at the trees, shoving my head phones into my pocket choosing the natural playlist already engulfing me. I passed readers, athletes, Mormon mommies, and old folks. A baby fox and I played what he probably thought was peek-a-boo. Whereas I was playing I'm-keeping-an-eye-on-you. I kept envisioning turning my head for one minute and him coming to swipe me out at the ankles. Whatever. I'm glad I have an imagination.
I took the long way to the library. Choosing the back curvy roads, lined with mansions whose costs are unspeakable. I stared, as much as I could while still remaining safe on the road, at the house of my dreams. A white 2 story, with southern charm. A sweet wrap around porch, with a second floor balcony complete with 2 white rocking chairs, ceiling fan, and a view of the expansive park. A cute little family played basketball in front of the garage while I pined away alone in my little car. *sigh* Someday. Well, maybe not someday for that exact picture but someday for the warmth that scene brought to my heart. Someday. Walking into the library, to what should my searching eyes rest on but Ree Drummond's book Black Heels to Tractor Wheels. Who's Ree Drummond you ask. Maybe you know her better as The Pioneer Woman. If you've not yet heard of her, continue to claw your way out from underneath that rock and fall in love with her sassy personality and heart stopping kitchen creativity over at her blog. You'll not regret it!
Then on the heels of 9o'clock I swung by Qdoba because it sounded tasty and I have a rewards card with them. If I'm going to eat out I might as well be rewarded for it right? I chose the vegetarian option, light on the dairy. He told me as he wrapped my bulging burrito that there was a slight tear. He asked if I wanted him to re-wrap it. When they ask you if you want it re-wrapped say yes. Always say yes. For if you don't and you chose, out of hunger and fear of eating after 9, to eat the massive burrito while driving you will have the death of that burrito all over the front of your shirt and the seat of your car. Pulling into my driveway I emptied the rest of that burrito into the bag it came in sufficing to just eat the tortilla. Trying to find some way to walk into my house without exposing the murder scene on my shirt the bag tore and the burrito remnants fell on to the door step. As I was trying to pick them up and fling them elsewhere I dropped my keys and the book into the mess and the door opened. The Man I Live With (there's not a shortcut around explaining them so I will just say I live with a family and they will be referred to as The Family I Live With, I'm not actually just living with a dude.) stood there peering down at my disaster. His words of comfort were that the dogs would get it. I scrambled inside and soaked my bean drenched shirt.
So, though, it didn't turn out quite like I expected I did have my glorious evening and feel like tomorrow I just be coherent enough to have another splendid evening!
What are you most excited for
with Autumn approaching?
Wednesday, August 31, 2011
A Martha
Today I was called a Martha. Before you start to think of me as holy I must tell you they were referring to Martha Stewart and I could not be happier. TODAY I WAS CALLED A MARTHA! It was a combination of things that brought on this compliment. The precise organization of my own desk. My slight obsession with organizing the supply closet, the cabinets, counters, and chairs. It was also the making of my jersey necklaces and turning the scraps into a flower broach. I'm sure my everyday cardigan wearing played a role. As well as my suggestion that we teach the kids how to make owl cupcakes for the fall. A Martha? For all the right reasons, I'll take it.
But speaking of fall, tomorrow is September 1st and I could not be more excited! Autumn is coming! Just saying September makes me want to light up a few warm candles, throw on a light sweater, crunch through the leaves, listen to bluegrass, and drink apple cider while crafting or reading some delightful book. Alas, it was 104 when I got into my car today. 104! Oh August, you never cease to amaze me. None the less, this weekend I'm going to The Country House with friends, which I feel has the potential to only make me desire the onset of Autumn further still. We'll chat and laugh, create, and relax while the men do their thing. There's sure to be floating and swimming in the river, roasting s'mores, and catching up. Doesn't it sound lovely? Yes, yes it does. You don't even have to say it I already know.
I hope you have an extended weekend filled with all the yumminess of life that you enjoy!
But speaking of fall, tomorrow is September 1st and I could not be more excited! Autumn is coming! Just saying September makes me want to light up a few warm candles, throw on a light sweater, crunch through the leaves, listen to bluegrass, and drink apple cider while crafting or reading some delightful book. Alas, it was 104 when I got into my car today. 104! Oh August, you never cease to amaze me. None the less, this weekend I'm going to The Country House with friends, which I feel has the potential to only make me desire the onset of Autumn further still. We'll chat and laugh, create, and relax while the men do their thing. There's sure to be floating and swimming in the river, roasting s'mores, and catching up. Doesn't it sound lovely? Yes, yes it does. You don't even have to say it I already know.
I hope you have an extended weekend filled with all the yumminess of life that you enjoy!
Saturday, August 27, 2011
27th day of August
Dear Friends,
You are the sweetest! Thank you for your sweet words, missing my blog :) That puts such a smile on this face, that not only do you read it, but you miss it when I'm not writing. Dear to my heart! Thank you. Today, I have hijacked a friends computer for a few hours to write a few words to you and of course catch up on Pintrest. It's like a friend I haven't seen in ages. We pick up right where we left off, as though no time has passed at all. That's right, I'm swooning over blogs and pins. It's the little things these days.
I had so many fun things I wanted to tell you but I'm listening to The Civil Wars and they have pushed out all those fun things with such contemplative thoughts and dreamings. They are some of my new favorites. Ever needing a folksy romantic fix they are the ticket!
Alright, so to spare you from the novel I could write about my life right now I will tell you 27 things, because it's the 27th day of August and that's good enough for me.
27. I had an odd sushi roll yesterday. Sweet potato and avocado. I was expecting those ingredients alone, you now like a PB&J sushi roll only has PB&J. This came with rice. Surprisingly delish!
26. I got said sushi roll because I'm now a vegetarian. Apparently an odd vegetarian because I don't like spicy stuff but restaurants tend not to make non spicy veggie things. (insert Debbie Downer sound effect here.)
25. I considered being vegan but then went to Jilly's Cupcake Bar and had a Space Monkey. I'm pretty committed to eating cream cheese for the rest of my life. If you haven't been to Jilly's, and I mean the actual shop, not just a place that sells her yummy products, you must go! She came in third place on Food Network's Cupcake Wars and she's right here in St. Louis!
24. My parents recently renewed their vows, which I was elected the planner of. I had to Google vow renewal etiquette cause I'd never attended one, much less planned it-- not much help as the general rule is there are no rules. It was a hit and made me question a bit why I didn't go the event planner route.
23. I've been helping to lead worship at my church recently. It feels like home, church, not the singing, I still want to vomit a bit before I sing each Sunday.
22. I've lived in St. Louis an entire 2 years and 6 days as an adult! And I can honestly say I LOVE IT~!! Who would have ever guessed?
21. I worked at the Jewish Community Center this summer. No, I am not Jewish. No, you do not have to be Jewish to work or work out there.
20. But I did find that the J (the cool name) is the place to meet attractive single men! Yowzers. It was a good summer. ;)
19. I'm still single.... so clearly it's a good place to meet them but anything beyond that is beyond me. Oh mycurse blessing!
18. I'm coming into my own, style wise. I used to buy things that were just ok because I'm a bigger girl and what hope did I have of finding clothing that I actually enjoyed and looked GOOD in? Well, daggum, that phase is over and I'm committed to looking and feeling good in what I wear!
17. So in that respect I got myself two hot-to-trot dresses that I adore and look quiet fabulous in! Now, I just need some places to wear them to. Maybe not anymore weddings cause I'm kind of tired of looking so awesome at weddings where there are no single men.
16. To my married friends: get some male single friends and hook a sister up. Not even friendS, just A friend. sheesh. ;) I kid. I kid. kind of.
15. I lost 21 pds. this summer. Between the never ending heat wave and being out in it the whole time, being vegetarianish, and having a free membership my odds were pretty good.
14. I may have gained it all back because of my refound love of Chick-Fil-A! I know this is counter vegetarian, but when a girl needs meat what better establishment to go to than one that openly promotes Christ and has DELICIOUS food. I'm just saying, when I put chicken on a bun with a few pickles it doesn't taste nearly as good.
13. I finally made a jersey braided necklace and scarf! It's been on my mental crafting checklist for a while now.
12. I went solo to a crafters event in a mall! I don't know if I've told you but I abhor malls to the very fiber of my being. Which could explain why I've still never been to Charming Charlie's which I hear will be my nirvana if ever we meet.
11. I've been crooning Adele's newest album 21. (Side note: does anyone know why she's numbering her albums, are they symbolic or random?) For a minute I thought she had crept into my internal monologues, alas she did not.
10. In a delusional fit I cut my own bangs. The original product looked like a mullet but with a little finesse they look intentional and edgy!
9. I'm about 2 seconds away from a new tattoo. Not that I've been thinking about it for 2 seconds. I've been thinking about it for 3 years. It's time.
8. I'll have to be careful about the timing of said tattoo because of MY NEW FULL TIME JOB working with students with severe special needs and the likelihood of being slapped or bitten near the tender art.
6. My computer is broken. I feel at any moment my car is going to fall apart, as well, on the highway, tires rolling every which way, hood smoking, the whole nine yards. It will of course wait another few months when I will be finished paying for it and warranty expired.
5. I tried to reconcile a broken friendship only to find out reconciliation is messy and my worst imagining didn't come close to what actually happened. Heart breaking, I know.
4. BSF starts back in a few weeks and I could not be more thrilled to be studying Acts. Want to come? You totally should!
3. My brother and his family live with my parents now. It is soooo sweet to have them near.
2. I'm planning a trip to London next summer to potentially help in opening an Asha Shop. :)
1. I am loving being creative! Between Forai, my amazingly talented friends, and my own motivation, I've got thoughts a'stirrin and I am excited!
And so, that's me in a nut shell right now. 27 things for 27 days of August. I hope you are well, that your summer was fantastic, and that you are living in joy right now!
You are the sweetest! Thank you for your sweet words, missing my blog :) That puts such a smile on this face, that not only do you read it, but you miss it when I'm not writing. Dear to my heart! Thank you. Today, I have hijacked a friends computer for a few hours to write a few words to you and of course catch up on Pintrest. It's like a friend I haven't seen in ages. We pick up right where we left off, as though no time has passed at all. That's right, I'm swooning over blogs and pins. It's the little things these days.
I had so many fun things I wanted to tell you but I'm listening to The Civil Wars and they have pushed out all those fun things with such contemplative thoughts and dreamings. They are some of my new favorites. Ever needing a folksy romantic fix they are the ticket!
Alright, so to spare you from the novel I could write about my life right now I will tell you 27 things, because it's the 27th day of August and that's good enough for me.
27. I had an odd sushi roll yesterday. Sweet potato and avocado. I was expecting those ingredients alone, you now like a PB&J sushi roll only has PB&J. This came with rice. Surprisingly delish!
26. I got said sushi roll because I'm now a vegetarian. Apparently an odd vegetarian because I don't like spicy stuff but restaurants tend not to make non spicy veggie things. (insert Debbie Downer sound effect here.)
25. I considered being vegan but then went to Jilly's Cupcake Bar and had a Space Monkey. I'm pretty committed to eating cream cheese for the rest of my life. If you haven't been to Jilly's, and I mean the actual shop, not just a place that sells her yummy products, you must go! She came in third place on Food Network's Cupcake Wars and she's right here in St. Louis!
24. My parents recently renewed their vows, which I was elected the planner of. I had to Google vow renewal etiquette cause I'd never attended one, much less planned it-- not much help as the general rule is there are no rules. It was a hit and made me question a bit why I didn't go the event planner route.
23. I've been helping to lead worship at my church recently. It feels like home, church, not the singing, I still want to vomit a bit before I sing each Sunday.
22. I've lived in St. Louis an entire 2 years and 6 days as an adult! And I can honestly say I LOVE IT~!! Who would have ever guessed?
21. I worked at the Jewish Community Center this summer. No, I am not Jewish. No, you do not have to be Jewish to work or work out there.
20. But I did find that the J (the cool name) is the place to meet attractive single men! Yowzers. It was a good summer. ;)
19. I'm still single.... so clearly it's a good place to meet them but anything beyond that is beyond me. Oh my
18. I'm coming into my own, style wise. I used to buy things that were just ok because I'm a bigger girl and what hope did I have of finding clothing that I actually enjoyed and looked GOOD in? Well, daggum, that phase is over and I'm committed to looking and feeling good in what I wear!
17. So in that respect I got myself two hot-to-trot dresses that I adore and look quiet fabulous in! Now, I just need some places to wear them to. Maybe not anymore weddings cause I'm kind of tired of looking so awesome at weddings where there are no single men.
16. To my married friends: get some male single friends and hook a sister up. Not even friendS, just A friend. sheesh. ;) I kid. I kid. kind of.
15. I lost 21 pds. this summer. Between the never ending heat wave and being out in it the whole time, being vegetarianish, and having a free membership my odds were pretty good.
14. I may have gained it all back because of my refound love of Chick-Fil-A! I know this is counter vegetarian, but when a girl needs meat what better establishment to go to than one that openly promotes Christ and has DELICIOUS food. I'm just saying, when I put chicken on a bun with a few pickles it doesn't taste nearly as good.
13. I finally made a jersey braided necklace and scarf! It's been on my mental crafting checklist for a while now.
12. I went solo to a crafters event in a mall! I don't know if I've told you but I abhor malls to the very fiber of my being. Which could explain why I've still never been to Charming Charlie's which I hear will be my nirvana if ever we meet.
11. I've been crooning Adele's newest album 21. (Side note: does anyone know why she's numbering her albums, are they symbolic or random?) For a minute I thought she had crept into my internal monologues, alas she did not.
10. In a delusional fit I cut my own bangs. The original product looked like a mullet but with a little finesse they look intentional and edgy!
9. I'm about 2 seconds away from a new tattoo. Not that I've been thinking about it for 2 seconds. I've been thinking about it for 3 years. It's time.
8. I'll have to be careful about the timing of said tattoo because of MY NEW FULL TIME JOB working with students with severe special needs and the likelihood of being slapped or bitten near the tender art.
6. My computer is broken. I feel at any moment my car is going to fall apart, as well, on the highway, tires rolling every which way, hood smoking, the whole nine yards. It will of course wait another few months when I will be finished paying for it and warranty expired.
5. I tried to reconcile a broken friendship only to find out reconciliation is messy and my worst imagining didn't come close to what actually happened. Heart breaking, I know.
4. BSF starts back in a few weeks and I could not be more thrilled to be studying Acts. Want to come? You totally should!
3. My brother and his family live with my parents now. It is soooo sweet to have them near.
2. I'm planning a trip to London next summer to potentially help in opening an Asha Shop. :)
1. I am loving being creative! Between Forai, my amazingly talented friends, and my own motivation, I've got thoughts a'stirrin and I am excited!
And so, that's me in a nut shell right now. 27 things for 27 days of August. I hope you are well, that your summer was fantastic, and that you are living in joy right now!
Tuesday, July 12, 2011
I Miss You!
You're still here! Thank you. I was just doing a little check of the site and saw that you are still visiting, catching up on your summer reading I imagine. Well, thank you. The computer is still dead with little hope of revival and the possibility of gettig a new one seems distant. So, in the mean time I'll stalk myself through this little device I'm so greatful for. I miss this and I miss you.
Friday, June 10, 2011
Remember When?
Hey, so do you remember when I used to blog? You remember, back when my computer worked? Well, I feel like that's been ages ago. I justed wanted to at least pop in via itouch and let y'all know I'm alive, but my computer isn't. Be praying for that, as this blog is such a fun outlet for me and I hope for you. Hope you're well and enjoying summer! Hopefully talk to you soon!
~ angielee
~ angielee
Wednesday, June 1, 2011
{The Great Divide} talking about what we don't talk about
I'm presuming there are not a lot of men who visit this little world of mine. In fact I only know of one who has me in his Google Reader (or maybe HAD me there :) Thanks Jay!)
So what better platform to have a bit of a gripe about what awesome single ladies gripe about occasionally to close friends or acquaintances or in my case total strangers... our singleness and the lack of control we have over it.
So, recently I've had the privilege to speak with several a single lady who are baffled like me by the state of too many lovely christian women. I read a while ago there are people who are single for a reason and people who are single for a season. Despite either of these two logic's the alarming truth is that there are an astounding number of women who desire to be married, to raise children, are of a reasonable age and are AMAZING. I'm not just talking like hey I'm cool "amazing" but like hey I'm COOL, I LOVE Jesus, I'm about the work of HIS Kingdom, and I'm gonna do this thing with our without a husband kind of AMAZING.
But what IS lacking is AMAZING men to come along side these women. Don't get me wrong, there are guys out there. That's not the problem. The problem is these AMAY-ZA-ZING women don't just want some guy. They want a man. Can I just include myself in there? I mean I like to think of myself as pretty amay-za-zing as well. WE want a man. Stop me if I'm wrong.
I'm not expecting this man to be the best at everything or at anything. I'm expecting, and I assume I'm not alone in this, a man to love Jesus, to be committed to His Kingdom, and his purpose within the Kingdom. I'm expecting that he be apart of the Church and his church. These are foundational things. Anything outside of this is preference and is debatable.
So... what's up? For realsies? Cause I'm not seeing that this list is something insurmountable. But what I do see are churches or organizations filled with women, sprinkled with men, and many a man not willing, interested, or motivated to ask a lady out. I understand there is fear of rejection. Risk. Whatever else may be a hindrance. But men this is your biblical role, to initiate, to pursue, to risk the rejection, or maybe just maybe hear a resounding YES.
I know once there used to be a stigma maybe with dorkier, shyer, socially awkward men versus the smooth, popular guy. But men, can I just give you some encouragement if you're still reading this, nearly ALL of my friends, who are AMAZING, have said they prefer the shyer, dorkier, socially awkward men! No joke. You are not the underdog anymore, so stop behaving like it. Put on the pants that are rightfully yours, pray, and pursue. Yes, you may get rejected. Yes, it may hurt a bit. But you also might find an AMAY-ZA-ZING jewel.
And to my dear ladies, myself included, I think Oswald Chambers said it best " If I put my trust in human beings first, I will end in despairing of everyone; I will become bitter, because I have insisted on man being what no man can ever be- absolutely right. Never trust anything but the grace of God in yourself or in anyone else." Our trust, hope, and desires cannot be wrapped up in man, for they will always disappoint and we will always disappoint them. But who we continue to trust in, look towards, and lean on is Christ. The One who never disappoints and indeed is shaping you into the amazing women you are.
I pray for our hope and strength to be found in Him. And I pray that our focus would be on the grand purposes He has set aside for you to do in the area He has placed you even now.
So what better platform to have a bit of a gripe about what awesome single ladies gripe about occasionally to close friends or acquaintances or in my case total strangers... our singleness and the lack of control we have over it.
So, recently I've had the privilege to speak with several a single lady who are baffled like me by the state of too many lovely christian women. I read a while ago there are people who are single for a reason and people who are single for a season. Despite either of these two logic's the alarming truth is that there are an astounding number of women who desire to be married, to raise children, are of a reasonable age and are AMAZING. I'm not just talking like hey I'm cool "amazing" but like hey I'm COOL, I LOVE Jesus, I'm about the work of HIS Kingdom, and I'm gonna do this thing with our without a husband kind of AMAZING.
But what IS lacking is AMAZING men to come along side these women. Don't get me wrong, there are guys out there. That's not the problem. The problem is these AMAY-ZA-ZING women don't just want some guy. They want a man. Can I just include myself in there? I mean I like to think of myself as pretty amay-za-zing as well. WE want a man. Stop me if I'm wrong.
I'm not expecting this man to be the best at everything or at anything. I'm expecting, and I assume I'm not alone in this, a man to love Jesus, to be committed to His Kingdom, and his purpose within the Kingdom. I'm expecting that he be apart of the Church and his church. These are foundational things. Anything outside of this is preference and is debatable.
So... what's up? For realsies? Cause I'm not seeing that this list is something insurmountable. But what I do see are churches or organizations filled with women, sprinkled with men, and many a man not willing, interested, or motivated to ask a lady out. I understand there is fear of rejection. Risk. Whatever else may be a hindrance. But men this is your biblical role, to initiate, to pursue, to risk the rejection, or maybe just maybe hear a resounding YES.
I know once there used to be a stigma maybe with dorkier, shyer, socially awkward men versus the smooth, popular guy. But men, can I just give you some encouragement if you're still reading this, nearly ALL of my friends, who are AMAZING, have said they prefer the shyer, dorkier, socially awkward men! No joke. You are not the underdog anymore, so stop behaving like it. Put on the pants that are rightfully yours, pray, and pursue. Yes, you may get rejected. Yes, it may hurt a bit. But you also might find an AMAY-ZA-ZING jewel.
And to my dear ladies, myself included, I think Oswald Chambers said it best " If I put my trust in human beings first, I will end in despairing of everyone; I will become bitter, because I have insisted on man being what no man can ever be- absolutely right. Never trust anything but the grace of God in yourself or in anyone else." Our trust, hope, and desires cannot be wrapped up in man, for they will always disappoint and we will always disappoint them. But who we continue to trust in, look towards, and lean on is Christ. The One who never disappoints and indeed is shaping you into the amazing women you are.
I pray for our hope and strength to be found in Him. And I pray that our focus would be on the grand purposes He has set aside for you to do in the area He has placed you even now.
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