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Hello! Hola! Bonjour! My word it's been awhile. How are you? Anything new in your world?

I feel as though everything is new in mine. With the move that's less than 20 minutes from where I grew up and spent the past 2 years I feel like I'm in a totally different city. It's as though I'm living in Texas, specifically Plano. Every thing is so much more grandiose and extravagant. I'm taking roads I've never been on before, which you know is one of my favorite things, but it's strange because this is my town. I should know these roads. Instead, I'm driving with friends as a passenger just so I can acquaint myself with my surroundings, learn these new winding roads, and read sign after sign, another favorite past time. Are you the sign reader in the car? Every car has one and in mine it's me. It's a whole new side to St. Louis. One that I avoided frequently because well, I often don't feel like I belong in the environment.

I've moved to Town & Country, which is just that; both town and country. It's a sweet area of St. Louis that bustles with city life and nature. It holds some of the most expensive homes I've seen in real life and lil ole me is now living there. I really wrestled with the move, because of my insecurities but also because of my own bias towards the rich. So as I settled in to the new digs and adjusted to the new family I asked God why in the world He would move me out here. For the path that I saw for myself, this move was in the opposite direction. As Jeane and I drove, exploring the new surroundings we came across some interesting places that confirmed in my heart my purpose for this time.

Within but a 10 mile (+ or -) radius of my new home there is a Mormon Temple, a church of Christian Scientology, a Hindu Temple, and an Islamic Temple. Immediately there came to mind the verse about it being easier for a camel to go through the eye of a needle than for a rich man to get into heaven. Christianity, following Christ, is the only religion that requires a humbling of self, a giving up of ALL idols for the sake of The One King and His One Kingdom. All other beliefs are false and do not lead to everlasting abundant life. So, my conviction, after seeing these dear places is to pray for them and the various people that are associated with their false teachings.

A day is coming when no more will my prayers be heard by the Father because the eternal fate of the lost will be sealed. But, until that day, my heart and mouth will plead the cause of these people, that God, Jehovah, may be merciful in giving them time to see the error of their ways, to repent, and to draw near and live out the truth of The Gospel.

I thank God that He has brought me to this place, where I can swim, listen to cicadas and church bells, watch deer graze, and enjoy life. I thank God that I'm no further from my own church that challenges me to not get wrapped up in the things of this life and my own longings but pushes me to care more for Him and His Kingdom purposes. I thank God that He has placed me right here, right now, for such a time as this. And I thank God that He still hears the prayers of His people and acts on their behalf.

For His glory and His fame in this new place I now call home.

Dancing In The Streets

Today driving to work I noticed the elegance and balance it takes to drive down the highway between these little lines we call lanes. Today, maybe it was the shining sun or the beautiful breeze but I was feeling whimsical. As I watched these cars float by me I just thought about how much this driving thing is like a dance. There are some people who know what they're doing in their dance shoes, others who are totally uncomfortable. There are some who keep beat, those who are a little spastic zipping and racing around the floor, and those that are slow and off beat. There are times when toes get stepped on or bums get bumped and cause a jam but the dance goes on.
Just my little thoughts from my pleasant dance to work this morning.

But for real, I'd like to go dancing sometime soon (cough, cough, this weekend). A little rump shaking, a little fox trot, a little ball change, maybe some salsa, and a lot of fun.

What are your plans for

the weekend?

Any dancing involved?

Cause you know...

Nobody

puts

baby

in

a

corner 

!

Favorites

My friends. I went to another craft show on Saturday (AHHHHHH!!! LOVE). My heart soars. MY HEART SOARS!!! So I just wanted to show you two of my faves.

It was a rainy, kind of icks day for an outdoor craft show so there weren't as many vendors there. However the one that sent me over board in giddiness at the last show at Oak Knoll was there. I nabbed a card and can show you her stuff!

I have to tell you, when I was in high school I used to wear thrift store bought ties around my head as head bands. I loved it, minus the having to retie it because, well ties weren't meant for heads. SO, Buffalo Blue has solved my dilemma! Yippie!

Then, I found Cristin Rae, who is the cutest, sweetest, and talented BELIEVER. I LOVED all of her stuff. So, I bought a sweet flower clip and rocked it all day yesterday. I got lots o'compliments!

Like Cristin Rae's stuff?

You can get 10% off your online purchase.

Just use this code:

10PERCENT

enjoy!

Cheers!

Heart soaring.
Cheeks beaming.
The Giddies.

I'm looking to transfer within the company, a promotion of sorts. I was called today and told that I had OUTSTANDING recommendations and I could "pretty much pick the job of my choice". When I told her my heart was set on one particular position, she said she'd "whisper in ears and get me to the top of the list." Someone please pinch me cause this would be cruel if it were a dream.

Just this week I've concluded my study of Isaiah with BSF. Today I'm reminded of one of my favorite promises from the study; Isaiah 60:22 "I am the Lord; in its time I will hasten it." Dear friends, many of you have walked this long road with me. Some of you have just joined in. I thank you for your consistent and faithful prayers for me. I know that it has been for my good that I had great bitterness (38:17). Without those times I would not know the true character of my Savior. I would not know the true strength of His Spirit that dwells within man. So thank you for your encouraging words, your physical provision, and your comic relief. You truly have strengthened my weak hands and feeble knees. You have soothed my anxious heart with your assurance that He will come to save (35:3&4). I have searched for stability in many lesser things and even without this good news He has been just that: stable (33:5&6). I am confident that everything He begins, He will also bring to pass (37:26). I have experienced many a let down in these recent years, so I'm cautiously thrilled about the possibilities. I'm seeking to not let my hope be built on them but on the faithfulness of The One who restores the years the locust have eaten (Joel 2:25). I know that I have nothing to fear, even if the bottom drops out again, because I know that His delight is in me (62:1-5) and that He, the Mighty One of Israel is with me (43).

So cheers for ALL that the Lord is doing in the heart and lives of His people even now.

*Now for you all who have been praying with me, you know the 3 things we've been praying about. And I'm just saying: home (check), job (potential check) within a matter of literally 1 week. Hows about we step up our praying about a Heath Sundae with Caramel?! ;)

For Lauren

I'm done pretending that any of these blogs have cohesive meaningful thought. I'm just gonna tell you it as it comes. So, if you want to come visit me, which you should, you'll need to come before Wednesday the 25th. If you come after then, which you totally can, you won't be seeing me cause I'll have moved to my new place, which I am forever referring to as Cheshire Mansion. Yes, that's right I'm moving! I'm sure I'll write more about it later, but if I forget the short of it is; my brother's family is moving in which means I'm moving out. Want more info than that, stay tuned, drop a message, or give me a ring on the telle. Y'all know I'm an open book!

None the less, if  you're coming to visit me, you should know some things before the trek. First, you should know how much I adore guests. Second, you should know that the streets leading to my house are all speed traps. Third, you should know that I will probably challenge you to a face off. That's right a face off! A favorite past time of mine is making silly faces in the mirror. Any of you who speak to me in person on the regular obviously know this as you tell me all the time how "expressive" (code for crazy) my faces are.

You should also know that a new hobby is developing, but rarely occurs outside of my car. I'm developing my mad skills as a beat boxer. Go ahead, reread it b-e-a-t--b-o-x-e-r. So tonight, driving home after a great time at house church and catching up with Lo (see title) I was a beat boxing fool. I was kind of impressed with myself, not as good as this guy but I'm a rookie. Turning on to my street a sweet beat started rumbling through my lips and I turned down the air (cause it's gone from 50-90 in the STL) so I could hear it. Wrapped up in my own rhythms I didn't notice that I was going 25 in my lame 20mph neighborhood. Well, I didn't notice that is, until the police car parked on my right turned on his lights. My beats weren't so awesome right then, however my heart beat was rockin out! "Dang, why my beats gotta be so dope?" I asked myself. I didn't actually ask myself that, I was more like "Shoot! I definitely deserve this one."

Do you want to know what happened next? He just sat there. Lights on. Parked. So I hesitantly kept driving, not wanting to make him think he was going to have to high speed chase me down. I knew I was wrong, I was ready for my ticket. I went over the hill, staring through my rear view mirror, fully expecting a patrol car to come barreling over the hill meeting me just as I pulled up to my house! He didn't. I got out and went inside. What grace! Totally knowing what I deserve, but not receiving it. Mmmmm. That's good stuff.

So, I'm thinking, I might need to move my mad skills to the house, where distraction is welcomed, maybe not so much on the road.

{Free}

Yep, still feeling free as a bird. Lots of exciting things happening over here friends! I'll update you as they come along. (excuse the cheesy video but I just love the idea of that freedom!)

*Side note: Is anyone else completely in love with almost everything in this issue of Anthropologie? I'm glad there are crafty people out there who can teach me to make those things for WAY cheaper.

My Messy, Thrilling Life

I follow this completely adorable blog called My Messy, Thrilling Life and I could think of NO better title for this post than that. There's so much to say that just doesn't fit together quite right so pardon my scattered thoughts here:

1. I just murdered the biggest bug (not a spider) I've ever seen in real life. I say murdered, because I heard its oxygen and goo seeping from it's smashed shell underneath my shoe. I say shoe because it was too large to be killed with a flip flop- my normal weapon of choice. Who won't be sleeping well tonight? That's me!
2. The giddies over took me again today, the hope of... well hope springing up. See # 5 the purpose of this post.
3. I saw a friend who is a hilarious, well mannered, skinny man playing his cello like it was a guitar tonight. I almost cried it looked so great. I also almost cried when he stopped before anyone could get a picture of it.
4. I have been abundantly blessed with women in my life that pour truth into me. Recently, I have had 3 separate women who don't know each other and aren't intimately involved in my life on a day to day basis speak similar words of encouragement and peace to me through thoughtful emails. I will share with you anonymously the sweet words these women shared with me some day soon.
5. THE BEAST, the reason this post exists.

Have you seen The Holiday? Oh dear one, it's a must and I don't often call movies a must but this one, it's there. So there's this part in the movie when Kate Winslet's character (you already know what I'm going to say don't you? Ya, it's one of those moments!) has a breakthrough with a man that has captivated her heart for FAR too long. She finds her voice, gathers a little "gumption" (no but seriously you have to watch it. Call me, we' ll watch it together) and kicks this man out for good, slamming the door behind him in utter VICTORY! And from the pits, deep with in, a yell comes from the depths of her soul that screams of freedom!

(Ok, here's a tiny clip, but then really, you must see the whole thing!)

Oh, my sweet friends. Today was my day. Today I screamed for freedom over and over and over again as I retold the story. The story of the 16 year long saga of me and a guy that came to a beautiful, completely final END. I found my voice and it wasn't at all what I thought it would sound like. At least in this situation. The voice I found was of deep compassion, care, and concern for him and his well being, but confident that that well being is completely apart from me. I spoke words of kindness, when I expected words of hate. I spoke words of care when I thought there was bitterness. My friends, we call lesser things epic, but this, THIS IS EPIC!

And the most glorious thing is that it's by absolutely no effort of my own. In 16 years I consistently ran back, in 16 years I questioned to be or not to be, in 16 years I never felt completely sold on no. But I'm here tonight telling you confidently, Freedom is mine! The Lord IS making all things new, even now! EVEN NOW! He is restoring the years the locusts have eaten. Sisters, brothers, this is GOOD news. This has been a long awaited time, prayed for by many, answered by One! There's no other reasoning for it, than from the hand of God Himself. Without me realizing it, He has brought healing to some of the most broken parts of me. He has given me a voice to say "no more." He's given me genuine love for one I once called an enemy. Y'all, I don't know if you get it, but this is H-U-G-E (regular sized letters would not have done the trick.)!

This little life of mine, that I don't know what the Lord is doing with, is messy, but today I could not be more thrilled about it! This song only makes me a bit more thrilled about it!

10 Years Later

In 4 months and 10 days it will be September 11, 2011, 10 years after the tragedy that struck New York, DC, America. Today, Osama Bin Laden was killed, announced officially dead by President Obama.

I imagine the memorial of 9/11 will have a much different feel this year. A sense of some sort of punishment served, justice prevailed. Tonight we celebrate. There are people dancing in the streets, shouting American anthems, rejoicing in the victory of the moment. There is joy to be had at the death of one who indeed brought so much death.

I myself, am conflicted. I rejoice, not with dancing in the streets, but with a smile, a deep sense of gratitude to my God and to those who did the act that I myself never could. But I also mourn. I think of the lives that were lost on 9/11 and since then through war. Bin Laden's death doesn't make up for their's. It doesn't some how make everything right again. And I'm confident, where ever the souls of those slain lay, they no longer care about Bin Laden. I'm sure there is rejoicing in heaven, but of a different kind. A rejoicing that God again proves that evil will not win the day. Not a rejoicing that a sinful and unrepentant man received his reward of death.

My soul aches with the thought that he has led so many astray. Many that will now, in retaliation, scheme, plot, and attack those of whom they hate. My soul aches with the thought that many Americans will no longer see their need for God. When there are times of victory our hearts turn from the true Victor. The combination in lethal. May God have mercy.

So tonight, as I lay my head down for bed, I pray that we not have a false sense of security but that we would rest in the Sovereign hand of God. I pray that I would not be glad in the death of an evil man, but that I would be glad in the death of the evil practices of that one man. I pray that my American pride would not overshadow my call to love those that despise me, my religion, or my country. And I pray that just as we turned to God in times of severe duress, that we again would Trust In God and give Him the honor He deserves.

I Think I'm In Love

A Whole New World the song kept running through my mind while I was at the St. Louis Indie Craft Revolution. My heart was bursting with gladness, my eyes wide and grasping every last morsel of crafted goodness. My hands roamed over every beautiful thing.

I think I'm in love. I don't know if other people go to a craft show and have the same kid of thrilling experience that I had. I don't know if they have to physically restrain themselves from squealing in delight over neck tie head bands. YES!!!! You read it right. Or if they feel the urge to tell every vendor they delight in how wonderful their work is. If this was a love language I would have found mine. If this is a personality type, I fit right here! I could have stayed there all day, literally all day, chatting with people, feeling their products, imagining my life with those things. Ahhhh. SO energizing.

So you know, because I have no money but the hope that someday I will I grabbed up ALL of the cards I could. Literally, all the things I loved I took a card for. 14 in total. 14 booths that made my heart skip a beat. 14 booths that made me giddy with the thought of crafting it myself, being friends with them, or someday having their product in my life. And... I couldn't wait to tell you about it. I had to tell you about it.

I know you know my heart but lack of ability. I've got a crafters heart but a doorposts skills and a poor man's budget. Oh if I could!

But for now I'll dream and wish of the day that I'll live in some other land, married, with 5 little ones racing around, crafting away while telling women about the Good News of Christ. One day my friends, mark my words.  

********
I needed today to lift me from my pit. I don't know if you read my rantings here, if you did bless your heart and I'm not always that Debbie Downer, just one of those days. I'm sure you know exactly what I mean....hmmph maybe not. If you didn't, keep my light heartedness read here in mind as you read my release of pint up emotions there. ;)  

One Week Ago

Unless you live under a rock or just don't care I'm sure you've heard about the devastation St. Louis encountered Good Friday, the same series of storm systems that recently attacked Alabama. I wanted to write something, but I had no words, and honestly no real concept of what had just happened to my city. So I didn't write. I just watched. I watched every news cast that covered it. Turned through picture after picture on Facebook. Soaking it all in, trying to get some perspective on what just occurred a mile from my house.

                                   

As I viewed the coverage my mind just couldn't wrap around it. I've lived here 20 years and yet couldn't recognize one picture I saw. Everything broken, tattered, tossed about carelessly by an unleashed tornado. Precious trinkets from homes lay on the ground, entire trees uprooted lying as though they were just branches whipped about by the wind. These things don't happen in the city.

(photo courtesy of kmov 4) 

"Tornado's rarely come into the city." I had just heard a forecaster say those similar words and I freely told friends this news as to calm their nerves as church let out that Good Friday night to sirens blaring warning of the oncoming danger. I, confident that our area would not get hit, went to dinner with friends. It was only when I came home and turned the t.v. on that I knew anything had happened. I called my friend driving that way from my house to warn of the chaos she was about to run into. I had no idea.

Through Maryland Heights, Bridgeton, Lambert Airport, Berkley, Ferguson. I rarely travel that direction during the day, so I went the entire week without seeing the devastation myself. One week and I had already let it slip from my mind. My life was not affected, so my thoughts were not diverted from the every day tasks and family/ministry/relational thoughts I have normally. I had vaguely forgotten, remembering not to take certain ways if I had to travel that way, but never thinking about the people now displaced, not really.

(Photo courtesy of Victor Alexander)

Today, distracted by the sunshine, I took St. Charles Rock Road. I took it all the way down to the overpass. Things began to feel eerily different, disheveled. I began to see business' windows boarded up, blue tarps, bare tree tops, broken limbs. Then there was this clearing. A clearing that had never existed before. Greenery used to hide the homes that sat on the hill. For all I knew looking there, that forest continued on forever. But today, I saw. The thick destroyed and the damaged exposed. I felt I should turn away, to give them the privacy the trees once did but I couldn't. It was all I could do to not pull over and weep for them, for their loss, for their pain. Some homes a complete loss, others untouched, most having major chunks missing from them. The ruins were strewn about, wood beams that once made a home stable now looking like broken toothpicks.

I know my tears would not help. They would not heal. But the sight was all too overwhelming. A devastation our tender hearts were never to know, yet for The Fall. 35,000 without power, many homes completely destroyed, many more people displaced, yet NOT ONE life lost. What a miracle, what a gracious act of mercy from The Sovereign One.

For as destructive and powerful as these tornadoes have been both here and in the south they are but the very fringes of the power of The Lord, The God of Jacob, The Redeemer. A nation's shock at the turmoil these disasters bring, is nothing compared to the awe that will overwhelm the nations when Faithful and True rides in to redeem His own and demolish His enemies.

My dear friends (I know we don't know each other, but I consider us friends if that's ok?) those are your options; to be called His Own or to be an enemy. There is no third, secret option. He is withholding His full wrath so as to give time for decisions to be made. Choose now dear one. As a day will come, and is coming soon, when your choice will be made whether by your own deduction or an end of time.

I pray that you are made new in the life that Jesus Christ offers through salvation. I pray that when your days are done on this tumultuous earth that you will rejoice forever with The King remembering no more the devastation of the past.