My Own Home Sick

Even with help from the Spanx I didn't get the job. Which of course sent me into a bit of tizzy, ranting and raving at God. Thank God He can handle me in my disappointments.

In the midst of my tears I found myself crying over my things. I just wanted to use my stuff. To feel my towels that have been tucked away. To eat from my Asian ornate plates with my squared top utensils. I just wanted to see all of my fall decorations, not just the iron pumpkin I could reach. It's been a year of using someone else's things. It's been a year of looking at mine packed in boxes stacked on top of each other. It's been a year of someone else's home. I'm wanting my own. My own space, my old things.

So I did what any bitter, homesick girl would do. I unpacked.

 I didn't take everything out. I just looked. Telling my things I loved them, I hadn't forgotten them, they would not be in there forever.   

Christmas Decorations

Fall and Valentines Day Decorations

And I realized maybe, just maybe that's what God was telling me too, "I love you, I haven't forgotten you, you will not be there forever."