For Lauren

I'm done pretending that any of these blogs have cohesive meaningful thought. I'm just gonna tell you it as it comes. So, if you want to come visit me, which you should, you'll need to come before Wednesday the 25th. If you come after then, which you totally can, you won't be seeing me cause I'll have moved to my new place, which I am forever referring to as Cheshire Mansion. Yes, that's right I'm moving! I'm sure I'll write more about it later, but if I forget the short of it is; my brother's family is moving in which means I'm moving out. Want more info than that, stay tuned, drop a message, or give me a ring on the telle. Y'all know I'm an open book!

None the less, if  you're coming to visit me, you should know some things before the trek. First, you should know how much I adore guests. Second, you should know that the streets leading to my house are all speed traps. Third, you should know that I will probably challenge you to a face off. That's right a face off! A favorite past time of mine is making silly faces in the mirror. Any of you who speak to me in person on the regular obviously know this as you tell me all the time how "expressive" (code for crazy) my faces are.

You should also know that a new hobby is developing, but rarely occurs outside of my car. I'm developing my mad skills as a beat boxer. Go ahead, reread it b-e-a-t--b-o-x-e-r. So tonight, driving home after a great time at house church and catching up with Lo (see title) I was a beat boxing fool. I was kind of impressed with myself, not as good as this guy but I'm a rookie. Turning on to my street a sweet beat started rumbling through my lips and I turned down the air (cause it's gone from 50-90 in the STL) so I could hear it. Wrapped up in my own rhythms I didn't notice that I was going 25 in my lame 20mph neighborhood. Well, I didn't notice that is, until the police car parked on my right turned on his lights. My beats weren't so awesome right then, however my heart beat was rockin out! "Dang, why my beats gotta be so dope?" I asked myself. I didn't actually ask myself that, I was more like "Shoot! I definitely deserve this one."

Do you want to know what happened next? He just sat there. Lights on. Parked. So I hesitantly kept driving, not wanting to make him think he was going to have to high speed chase me down. I knew I was wrong, I was ready for my ticket. I went over the hill, staring through my rear view mirror, fully expecting a patrol car to come barreling over the hill meeting me just as I pulled up to my house! He didn't. I got out and went inside. What grace! Totally knowing what I deserve, but not receiving it. Mmmmm. That's good stuff.

So, I'm thinking, I might need to move my mad skills to the house, where distraction is welcomed, maybe not so much on the road.